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Chapter 8: Mala’s Dilemma
Mala woke up refreshed the next morning. She went to the kitchen to make coffee for herself and her dad in her night dress. She thought of her dad and couldn’t help thinking about his naked form she had seen the previous night.
She shook off that image, steeled herself and came out of the kitchen with his coffee. As she reached the drawing room she found the front door being opened and her dad entering the house after his early morning walk sweating all over. She beamed at him and said:”Hello Appa” (father in Tamil).
Venkat was surprised to see her, but absolutely delighted. He approached her with a huge smile and opened his arms for her. Mala hurriedly put down the coffee cup and they both hugged.
Mala who had just shaken off his naked image was suddenly flustered and shivered involuntarily in his embrace. Venkat too felt her shiver, released her from his arms and asked her:”What’s wrong Mala? , is every thing all right? And any reason for this unannounced visit?”
Mala told him to relax, have his coffee first and then they could talk. They had their coffee in silence. She told him that she wanted to surprise him and her friend Devaki. She did have some marital problem and would explain everything later in the day.
She told her dad that she wanted to go and look up her friend Devaki and Kruthika next door and spend some time with them. Venkat told her:”Go ahead and I’ll join you later in Devaki’s house.”
She changed, went next door and surprised Devaki who was nursing Kruthika. The child was awake and happily suckling at Devaki’s milk filled breasts. When she saw Mala walking in unannounced, Devaki let out a loud hoop and delightedly welcomed her dearest friend.
Due to this Devaki’s nipple slipped out of Kruthika’s tiny mouth. Devaki laughingly put it back in the child’s mouth. Mala felt envious looking at this very homely scene.
Devaki told Mala that she was not her usual chirpy self and asked the same questions that Venkat had asked her about her visit.
Mala told her: “Yes I do have a problem with Krish which I wanted to share with you and ask your advice. Also I wanted to surprise you and my dad last night by arriving unannounced. However it was I who was surprised in the bargain seeing you and dad together in the penthouse.”
Devaki looked at Mala quizzically and said” How long did you watch us?”
Mala replied:”From start to finish.”
Devaki gestured for Mala to sit down next to her and took her hands in her own and asked her:” Is that all or you want to say or you have some thing more?”
Mala nodded her head and became highly emotional. She cleared her throat and started to narrate her marital troubles:
“You know that I have been married for more than a year. The first six months were blissful. Krish and I got along very well both temperamentally and in bed. Thereafter things started to slowly go down hill.
Krish started to spend more time out of home citing his job. His sexual activities started to wane. When we did engage in it he seemed disinterested and distracted. Since we were open with each other, I asked him about his disinterest. He was vague initially and then confessed that he was and is a gay.
He liked having sex with me and was happy during the first six months of our marriage. Thereafter he started loosing interest in me as his male lover who had gone abroad was back for good. He got married to me to keep up the appearance of a heterosexual male.
I was devastated and I told him so as it was a bolt from the blue for me. I have nothing against homosexuality. A person’s sexual preference is their own business. However this affected my sexual life. It came to a grinding halt.
We were both pretending to lead a normal life except in the bedroom. Other than his homosexuality, Krish continues to be a wonderful guy. He was liberal enough to tell me that he wouldn’t mind if I find myself a lover.
I hope he could have told me all this before the marriage and we could have gone our own ways. I had nowhere to turn to and was highly confused. I immersed myself in my work to keep highly busy so that when I returned home in the evenings I was dog tired to think only about sleep and nothing else.
This was alright for a few months. Then my craving for normal sexual life resurfaced in spite of my tiredness after work. I watched blue movies. I indulged in stimulating my self. There was never a complete satisfaction in all these self indulgence.
I reached a breaking point. I couldn’t keep things bottled up anymore. That’s the reason why I came here all of a sudden without informing you or dad. I didn’t have the courage to converse about this over the phone. Even now I am not sure whether I can tell dad all the things I narrated to you.
Then last night I saw you and dad having sex with abandon. It rekindled all my last six month’s pent up desires. Once earlier, you came home after mom’s death to console casino oyna and be with us at my request. I had seen you and dad making love boisterously. Dad was with his back to me and you were riding him like a horse naked below the waist.
However I saw dad fully nude for the first time only last night. I was amazed at his huge cock and I couldn’t help but compare it with Krish, the only other grown up cock I have seen, which is like a child’s. It really creamed me.
Your ability to match him stroke for stroke with your petite body was really wonderful. You feeding dad milk like a baby, the oral sex you performed on each other and the various positions in which you made love further turned me on and made me realize what I was missing. Some of it I have seen only in hard core porn sites.
I was embarrassed for spying on you both initially, but that soon turned me on mightily. Looking at you making love, I masturbated myself to climax. Later in my own bed I was once again highly aroused by thinking about my naked dad and climaxed for the second time.
I was mightily aroused last night resulting in subsequent actions. I met dad in the morning after his walk. As usual he hugged me, but this time I felt a delicious shiver trickling down my spine and pussy.
This has never happened to me before. Is it because I saw him naked? I think dad felt me shiver. He asked me if I was alright. I told him I’ll discuss with him later. I liked the feeling of being hugged by him in a non-daughterly way. I cannot wish away the fact that it aroused me considerably.
Are these feelings normal erotic arousal for a girl like me who hasn’t had sex with a male for a long time? Between last night and now I have often wondered if these feelings are incestuous. I am royally confused. You are the only person who can advice me”.
By now Kruthika had had her fill and was fast asleep with her mom’s teat in her mouth. Devaki gently put her down in the crib next to the bed where they were sitting. She turned towards Mala, embraced her and then they both sat on the bed.
It was Devaki who now started to verbalize her thoughts.
“Mala I can well understand what you are going through. Something similar happened in my life also. In my case it was Kumar who was and is least interested in sex. He is a workaholic.
So soon after our marriage, I wanted a baby so that I could keep myself busy. Here again Kumar turned out to be a disappointment. His sperm count was very low to be of any use. Karthik wouldn’t have been born but for me dragging him to fertility clinics for treatments. After Karthik’s birth my sex life turned from bad to worse.
When Karthik started going to kindergarten, I wanted another baby. It didn’t work out. I was so frustrated. That was when I came to Coimbatore to console you and your dad. Having sex with your dad was initially to pull him out of the loneliness he was in.
Slowly that turned into yearning for each other in a way neither of us anticipated. It turned into unconditional love by the time you were married. We were literally besotted with each other. If we were in the same city it became difficult for us to remain apart.
Neither of us considered this a sin or immoral. That’s why I call him by name and not uncle when we are alone. Your dad loves being called Venkat by me. For him age difference between us doesn’t exist.
Your dad is a fantastic lover. He becomes a teenager when we make love. We have no inhibitions between us. In spite of staying in different cities ardent feelings for each other didn’t diminish. It became raging in fact.
It was providence which brought me to Coimbatore in the form of Kumar wanting to shift his business here. Your dad and I were thrilled. It was doubly fortunate that Kumar, me and Karthik moved to this house next to your dad’s.
However, we had an understanding that if Kumar was in Coimbatore your dad and I won’t get together for sex. Then there was Karthik. We didn’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings by being promiscuous. Your dad got the penthouse done up and gave me a duplicate key for us to meet.
After coming here, Kumar wanted to admit Karthik in Lawrence School Lovedale in Ooty being his alma mater. I was very reluctant initially to put Karthik in boarding from such a young age. But Karthik was up to it. Once we visited the school I too was convinced.
My love life was now fabulous. However with Karthik in boarding school my feeling of loneliness became acute. Kumar’s problems still persisted. So I prayed for a second child. One day I mustered enough courage and asked your dad whether I can have his child.
He was initially taken aback. I explained Kumar’s inability to father a child. This convinced him and he agreed. But he wondered whether he was potent enough to impregnate me? We got tests done and which confirmed that he was more than capable.
Do you remember last year when your dad visited you? I also made a trip to Chennai to meet my parents. That canlı casino was the fertile period for me and your dad and I made love like there was no tomorrow and I conceived Kruthika.
Your dad also confessed to me that he wanted another child after you were born, but because of some complications your mother couldn’t conceive. When I became pregnant with his seed he was overwhelmed. He is a fabulous guy and I wouldn’t mind having more children by him.
We were so happy when it was confirmed that I was pregnant. I made love to Kumar around the same time. Also I substituted Kumar’s sperm with your dad’s in the fertility clinic so that I getting pregnant didn’t look amiss. Eventually every one was happy”.
Mala found that every second she seemed to be learning new facts about Devaki and her dad. She realized the depth of love between her dad and her dearest friend. She too was happy for both of them.
She happily blurted out:”Therefore, de-facto Kruthika is my step sister and you are my step mom. I can now listen to what ever my mom advices.” Saying this she hugged Devaki with tears of happiness in her eyes.
Devaki told her: “My advice to you is, listen to your conscience and act accordingly. Sin and morality are chimeras. As long as you don’t hurt anybody or force yourself on anyone, I don’t consider any act sinful or wrong.
You are yearning for physical love and there is absolutely nothing wrong in having erotic thoughts even if it’s about your own dad. Since it involves another person, whether these thoughts will fructify so that you achieve sexual satisfaction is something I can’t answer for.
You will have to be your own lawyer, judge and jury. Talk to your dad and come clean. It will benefit everyone in the long run. I will the happiest person if you succeed in your endeavors”.
By now Kruthika had woken up and Devaki once again fed her milk. Mala was fascinated and she felt wistful. She wondered if she would ever become a mother and nurse a child at her breasts.
Devaki correctly read her friends thoughts and told her:”Don’t worry Mala; you have all the time in the world to become a mother. Have patience.” Mala hugged her gratefully and playfully told her:”You sound exactly like my mom.” Both of them burst out laughing breaking the somber mood.
“Both of you seem to be having a good time it looks like:” said Venkat who had entered unnoticed. He too quickly grasped the mood both the women were in. His eyes turned misty seeing the three most important females of his family together. He found a lump forming in his throat when he tried to speak again.
He quickly came to them, knelt down and took all three of them in an embrace. He showed no embarrassment in hugging half naked Devaki in front of his daughter Mala. Both the women in turn hugged him back and sat silently for a while. Mala’s melancholy mood was lightened by this gesture.
Devaki was the first to break the companionable silence. She told Venkat:”Mala has some serious marital issues which we have discussed about. During this dialogue I have confessed all about us. She wanted my advice and I have been open with her. I request you also to listen to her with an open mind as soon as possible.”
Having known Devaki intimately for the last two years, Venkat was not surprised by her talk. He nodded his head as he had a great respect for her intuitive thinking. He got up, kissed little Kruthika and Devaki and offered his hand for Mala to get up and join him.
They both took leave of Devaki and left her room. Then they had lunch at a restaurant and went for a drive. Mala narrated about her marital problems with Krish.
Venkat was terribly saddened by the news. He never imagined that Mala’s married life would end up like this. Then Mala poured her heart out as to how frustrated she was sexually without a heterosexual husband.
Venkat had led a sexually active life with his wife. After her demise providence interfered in the form of lovely Devaki, his daughter’s young friend who was keeping his libido highly active. Therefore he was able to easily empathize with his daughter on her frustration.
So he told her:” I can only offer words of comfort for now and pray that things turn out for the better. I can easily arrange for a divorce if you so wish. You are just about thirty and can easily get married again. You are a beautiful girl and getting a husband won’t be a problem.”
Mala told him:”Appa (dad in Tamil), I’ve considered this option and have rejected it. It’s going to hurt a lot of people once it becomes public. That’s why I came here to brainstorm with you and Devaki to find an alternative. My surprise visit resulted in something else altogether.”
She went on to tell her dad what she witnessed the previous night at the penthouse. Before her dad could respond she narrated her feelings and actions during the witnessing and thereafter when alone in her bed.
“So I am in a dilemma Appa. Is this erotic feeling due to being without kaçak casino sex for long? Or am I really attracted to you? This morning when you hugged me I was aroused and that’s why you felt me shiver in your arms” added Mala.
Having heard all this, Venkat stopped the car in a quiet place, turned in his seat and faced Mala.
He took Mala’s soft face in his hands and looked at her. He found an innocent, attractive, troubled, healthy, and sexually active young woman done in by providence. But she was also his daughter. He was greatly upset that it was the same providence which brought him and Devaki together to heights of happiness had pushed his daughter into a deep trough.
He started to address Mala:” My dear girl, I have now perfectly understood your predicament. Your ruined married life has resulted in a sexual vacuum for you. Watching Devaki and me having the time of our life has reignited all your pent up passion. I am not at all embarrassed that you witnessed it and it turned you on. There’s nothing wrong about it. It’s only natural.
Also I further feel that you are attracted to me on a sexual rebound. Given time you will definitely find a good young man to take care of your sexual needs. I therefore feel that we should sit back and give ourselves time for this adrenaline rush to subside and take it on further from there.
I am not a preacher of morality. Sexual partner should be according to a person’s preference and nothing more.”
How ever as I am your dad, your pining for me has put both of us in a big spot. You are a beautiful woman whose desires need to be satisfied. I would be lying if I deny that I am not attracted towards you physically. I am not ashamed to admit it.
But I don’t want us to rush into anything which we might regret later. That’s the father in me speaking. I don’t want you to get hurt mentally once again. You recounting all the actions in the penthouse between me and Devaki have aroused me also quite a bit. That’s the virile male in me which has responded”.
Mala looked at her dad in the eye, took hold of his strong arms and told him:” Appa, I know that you are a decisive person. I think I understand you reluctance in coming to a quick decision. I truly respect that. You have understood that my frustrations are genuine. Tell me when the time is right.”
Venkat was not surprised by Mala’s reply. He knew her to be a strong willed girl like her dear friend and now his lover Devaki. He knew that she analyzed things quickly and arrives at a fast decision.
He once again hugged her and could hear her increased heart beat. He gently kissed her on her brow and felt her stiffen. He wanted to more than comfort her there and then. But with a sigh, he let go of her, started the car and drove home.
On reaching home Mala went to her room for a nap. Venkat went next door and met Devaki who was alone with Kruthika and recounted his conversation with Mala.
Devaki found him to be composed. She realized that he had made up his mind as to what needs to be done to keep Mala happy. But she waited for him to enlighten her.
He sat next to her on the sofa, took her in his arms and kissed her deeply. She responded accordingly. He broke the kiss and started to tell her his thoughts on his daughter’s dilemma.
“My love, when I was down in the dumps with self pity after Kalyani’s death, you came like an angel to me one afternoon and put me back on my feet a complete man. I now find that my daughter is down in the dumps and come to me for a solution and she has decided that I am the solution.
My apprehension is neither sin nor morality. It’s just that how long I will be able to satisfy her. Also I can’t just forget you or neglect you. You are the love of my life and someone else has arrived to share it. Will I be man enough for both?”
Devaki in her forthright fashion told him:”Dear Venkat, I will answer the second question first and assure you that you are more than capable for both. As to the first query, since nothing is for ever the question of ‘how long just doesn’t arise’.
For God’s sake I am sharing something precious with my best friend in her time of need and I have no problems over that. Remember I am her de-facto step mother. It’s the least I can do.”
Venkat was overwhelmed by her generosity and broadmindedness. He told her so. Devaki hugged him and told him:”Don’t worry darling, everything will workout alright. Now go and see how you can comfort Mala” and sent Venkat home.
That evening Devaki, Kumar, Mala and Venkat had dinner together at Kumar’s place. It was like old days. Karthik’s life at Lovedale was the main topic for discussion. Kruthika was also nearby sleeping peacefully in her crib.
On completion of dinner, Venkat took leave and with Kumar went out for an after dinner stroll. Venkat thereafter returned home to his room on the first floor for the night.
After the men folk left, Mala and Devaki cleared the table and sat down to talk as there was lot of catching up to do between the friends. After a while Mala too went home for the night. Before she left, Devaki hugged her and told her:”Don’t worry my dearest friend, things will workout fine pretty soon.”
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