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I drove all night to see her, or more correctly, hoping to see her. I closed my eyes briefly on the highway and I can see her face. I shouldn’t feel like this. I don’t want to feel like this. But I can’t help it, my mind goes flying and I have to wait for it to come back down. Are you beginning to understand any of this? I’m hoping to see her yet I shouldn’t feel like this, this ambivalence; I want to not want to as I put it.
The Adult Sports Bar is a twenty-two minute drive away. I find a spot to park and I go inside. I don’t see her right away because I am busy paying my cover charge. Then there she is, walking toward me after she sees me come in. She’s wearing that same tight red dress that I saw her in the first time, several months ago. She looks beautiful in it, but then again she looks great in every outfit she wears.
She comes up and says hello and gives me a hug. I can tell she’s a little drunk because she’s never done this before. Then again it’s been two months since she saw me last. “Come and sit with me.” She commands and I obey.
“Let me get my drink first,” I say.
“Shauna!” She cries out over the music, “Get Don his screwdriver!”
“So you’re saying I should screw Don?” Shauna replies with a smirk. Shauna is the bartender and could definitely get up on stage herself if she wanted, she had the body for it.
“Yes please, screw Don.” Amy says with a big smile. Still holding my hand she guides me to a table. She tells me to sit, her hands on my shoulders as she forcefully pushes me down into the chair. “Stay.” She says and I bark at her like a dog. She leaves and gets my screwdriver. I offer to pay but she waves away my handful of money saying that it was on her. “Besides,” she says with a smile, “You’re going to need that to tip me later after my dance.”
Amy takes a sip of her drink already at the table and I take one of mine. I glance at the stage for a brief moment and soak up the sight of the petite dancer swinging on the pole to the amusement of the crowd.
“So why don’t you come over anymore?” Amy says.
I still stared at the girl on stage for a moment. “I got the impression the last time I was over that you didn’t want me to be there, and after you didn’t return my phone call…” I let the sentence hang incomplete as I turn my gaze back on the object of my suppressed affections.
“Coming over is different than taking on the phone.” She states flatly.
“Then why didn’t you ever come over to my house?”
“Touché.” She says and takes another drink. Just like she told me awhile back, everything comes out when she’s drunk. Another friend told me too that drink makes you honest, no inhibitions. So you could consider it utter bullshit when someone blames an event that they wouldn’t normally do sober on being drunk. Alcohol releases the id in all of us.
“I’ve missed you,” Amy says tilting her head to the side. She must have realized what she just said and begins to fidget with a cigarette before lighting it.
My smile covers my entire face; I almost feel a blush coming on. None of my other blossoming relationships had stated anything like that before. Is that what this was, a blossoming relationship? Maybe it was like the rose I bought her for Valentines Day.
“So you’ve missed me, eh?” I ask leaning close so she can hear me above the music playing.
“Yes,” she says a bit sheepishly. Maybe some of it is the drink. Maybe some of it is honesty.
“Well, I’ve missed you too,” I say honestly. “I think about you all the time.” I add.
“You do? What do you think about?” she asks.
“Coming up here to see you, asking you out to dinner and a movie, watching you dance, that sort of thing.” I don’t add the thoughts about making love to her, or taking long walks on the Old Plank Road Trail with her, or walking along the beach and on towards the lighthouse with her, among countless other thoughts too numerous to mention. “Do you still have that rose I bought you?” I say changing the subject as I feel a bout of nervousness swelling in my belly.
“Yes I do. It’s in my bedroom. I hung it upside down to dry.”
“Why do you ask?” she says putting out her cigarette.
“Well, if you didn’t have it I’d have to get you another one.”
I’m nervous. There’s a pause in the conversation where neither of us knows what to say. I look at her and she’s looking at the stage. I think I’m falling in love, but that can’t be, I hardly know her, she hardly knows me, it can’t be love, it has to be lust, yes, I’m falling in lust. But it’s not the sex that I desire from her, it’s her companionship, so I guess I’m just falling.
“I’ll be right back; I have to go pick my songs.” Amy says and leaves.
My eyes halkalı eve gelen escort watch her go before bringing my screwdriver to my lips and taking a slow drink. I watch the girl writhe on the stage, taking the occasional dollar from the men seated at the rail. She was pretty, not as pretty as Amy, but still very pretty.
Amy came and sat back down with a fresh drink for herself and I. “I thought you could use a refill.” She said.
Soon she is leaving me to go on stage. “Kill” Bill is the jockey, so to speak, and introduces her as “Belle”. Watching her takes my breath away. I still can’t believe how beautiful she is. I’ve only felt like this once before, and that was with a high school crush ten years ago. I smile at her performance, admiring her every curve and gyration. I’m in love. Or is it lust? I’m falling. Her three-song set is done and she leaves the stage to collect tips and to go change outfits. “Kill” Bill introduces the next dancer.
She returns a short while later and takes her seat next to me. Her wardrobe has changed but she is still stunning in whatever she wears; black, white, red, she looks absolutely gorgeous in it all. I lean back in my chair and look at her soaking up every inch of her lovely body, especially her perfect face. If only I could have one wish …
She dances again. I take an open chair on the rail. With dollar in mouth I wait for her. She pulls me close and slides her chest up and down my face. I close my eyes and enjoy it. Finishing, she takes the dollar from my mouth with her breasts. I return elated to my seat. I love the feel of her body. I try to memorize every sensation so I can relive it whenever I’m feeling alone and needing the comfort of her beautiful body next to mine.
“Would you like me to keep you company tonight, if it’s alright with you that is?” I ask stumbling over my words. She just sat down after changing clothes from her last set and bar close is slowly creeping upon us so I decide to make another move to have her with me.
“I don’t think so, Don.” She says regretfully, “You’re too nice of a guy to have a one-night stand with.”
“I didn’t say anything about sex. Just to be together, no strings,” I say honestly.
“I’m sorry sweetheart, but I’ve got to go. I’ll see you the next time I see you, okay?” she says and leans over for a hug. I’m lost in the feel of her body against mine.
“All right, until next time,” I say trying not to sound dejected. It’s all divine; it’s never mine I think to myself. Regretfully the hug ends and we say goodbye to each other.
I drive home with the music turned all the way up; the cd is Life of Agony “Broken Valley”. I broke my heart again. It’s all my fault anyway, getting my hopes and expectations up. Nice guys finish last and all that. I silently hate myself for not trying harder to get her to be a part of my life.
At home I pour myself cranberry juice and double shot of vodka and put some music on loud, Type O Negative to be exact. I wallow in my self-pity. I cry a little. It’s been so long since I’ve had a relationship I feel like I don’t know how to anymore. What do I say? What do I do? I feel so emotionally unequipped to deal with relationships. And love.
I’m on my second double vodka and cranberry juice when the doorbell rings. I stagger to the door and flip the light on. I make a face because she smiles and laughs through the window.
“Open up!” she cries out. Regaining myself momentarily I open the door and let her in. I stare at her in a stupor, unbelieving that she’s really here, at my house. She’s known where I’ve lived now for a few months and has never come over, never called, nothing. I close the door behind her.
“Hi,” I stutter out, trying to think of something to say.
“Hi,” she says smiling, her face flushed from alcohol. “What do you got there?” she asks gesturing towards my drink.
“Vodka and cranberry juice.” I just get the words out when she takes the drink from my hand and helps herself to a few swallows as if we were already together. She makes a face and it is my turn to smile and laugh. She hands the cup back and gasps out the word ‘strong’. “Its how I like it.” I say.
“So, we gonna stand in the doorway all night or are you going to invite me up?” she asks with a smirk.
“Oh sure, come on up.” I say and turn around to lead the way.
We are in the living room of my apartment. She takes her coat off and lays it on the couch. She is wearing a pair of jeans and a buttoned up denim shirt. Her hair pulled back in a banana clip. I have a stick of incense burning next to an unlit candle. Type O Negative is still playing on the stereo.
I still am in shock that Amy came halkalı grup yapan escort over. She has never come over. Never. Never called or anything. Now hear she is in my house. She wanders over to my cd tower and skims over my collection. She quickly pulls out Alice Cooper’s Trash and tells me to put on “Hell Is Living Without You”, and I do.
“Come here,” she tells me when the song starts. She puts her arms around my neck. “Dance with me,” she says. I put my arms around her and we slowly move to the music.
She tilts her head up at me halfway through the song and leans in for a kiss and our lips meet. I’ve written countless poems and lyrics about our first passionate kiss but words don’t describe my feelings at all, and I am lost. Lost in my emotions, lost in her mouth where our tongues dance like two snakes in courtship, lost in her body where my arms have wrapped around her pressing her tight and close, lost in her arms around my neck pulling me into her lips, teeth, and tongue. Our feet have stopped moving but for me the room is still spinning around, revolving slowly as if we were still dancing.
Our kiss ends at the end of the cd and I can’t even remember hearing the last song. She breaks away leaving me breathless and returns to my cd tower and spins it until she finds what she’s looking for; Nine Inch Nails.
“Put Closer on,” she tells me, handing me The Downward Spiral.
“I’ll do one better,” I say and put the cd back and instead reach to the one next to it; the Closer two cd single release. “The first cd has a half hour of Closer remixes. I’ll put it on repeat.”
I take out Alice Cooper and put Closer in. Meanwhile Amy has found my bedroom adjacent to the living room and walks into the inviting dark. I follow her into that beautiful dark as she is unbuttoning her denim shirt. I can already see her lacy white bra while her fingers work each button open on the shirt.
“Go back and light the candle and turn off the overhead light, then come here.” Amy commands me and I obey. The candle is lit with a lighter kept nearby and the flame springs to life. With a click of the switch the lamp’s light is extinguished. The room is bathed in the soft glow of the candles flame, and as I return to the bedroom so is she.
Her shirt is completely unbuttoned and hanging open as I walk into her waiting arms. The music is playing just loud enough to be heard but not to be distracting. We kiss again, this time hungrier for each other then the first time. My hands caress her body and hers caress mine. Her denim shirt falls to the floor and my shirt follows. I leave her embrace to open the blinds and let the moonlight pour through the windows. As I do this she relieves herself of her jeans, and I follow suit. We are both standing in the soft, yellow glow of the candle from the living room and the pale, white light from the moon and stars outside.
I take her hands in mine and turn her around so I can unclasp her bra. She brings a hand up and touches the side of my face. As the bra comes free she tilts her head to the side for a kiss and my hands come up her sides to press firmly against her beautiful chest. We kiss some more.
She breaks away and crawls onto the bed on all fours. I crawl up behind her. She turns onto her back and lies down. I climb on top of her and kiss her some more. I kiss down her neck, her collar bone, and trail kisses to first one breast then to the other. I suck the cherry nipples into my mouth and make them hard like little pillars. I kiss down her supple belly and hook my fingers into her thong. She raises her hips up off the bed allowing me to easily draw the material down her beautiful legs. The garment joins the others on the floor so as not to be left out.
She spreads her legs and I crawl between them. I kiss slowly from one knee down the inside of her thigh until I am brushing my lips across the folds of her labia, blowing on them softly. Amy utters a soft plea for me to begin and I lick experimentally at the cleft. It is already very wet and my tongue slides between the lips of her pussy with sweet ease. I lick up and down the slit, from her opening to her clit. I suck the little nub of her clit into my mouth between pursed lips and nurse upon it gently.
My hands roam across her thighs up to her belly until I find her hands and lace my fingers with hers; all the while I am diligently licking up and down her wet slit. Amy nears orgasm so I concentrate on her clit flicking it up and down, and side to side with my tongue. Her back arches and she moans breathlessly with the impending orgasm, her body shudders and every undulation is punctuated with a cry out to God. She cums and I lap up her juices.
Amy pulls halkalı masöz escort our laced hands apart after a few moments of my licking. “It’s too sensitive, Donny. Stop, oh please stop.” She begs and it sounds melodic. I comply. I get up off of the bed. “Where’re you going?” she asks worried.
“To get a condom,” I state.
She smiles at my thoughtfulness. “No condom, just come here and love me.” She says and I do.
I get back on to the bed and climb between her splayed thighs. I guide myself towards her opening and rub the head up and down her slit a few times to get the head nice and wet for the penetration. She tilts her pelvis trying to get me inside her before I’m ready; the gesture is not in vain. I sink slow and deep inside herm, filling her. She is so wet I slide in to the hilt.
“Stop for a minute,” she whispers.
“Are you alright?” I ask concerned.
“Yes, I’m just enjoying how good you feel inside me.” She says smiling. I lean down and kiss her. As if on cue I begin to push in and out of her body. I kiss her neck, biting it gently. I suck on her earlobe. I kiss and bite her shoulder. Then I do the other side. I push in and out of her beautiful body. I take her hands in mine again and hold them against the bed, and she submits to me. I kiss her mouth and she sucks hungrily on my tongue. I can feel her body writhe beneath me in little orgasm after little orgasm, the build up to a big orgasm.
I lean up and pull first one leg then the other in front of me. I hold them together against my chest as I continue to push in and out of her beautiful body. I lightly kiss her feet and she laughs and tells me to stop. I push her legs back until her knees are pressed against her small tits and her pussy opens up to me. I fuck her in long, deep thrusts. I lie down on her using my chest to hold her legs against her breasts, and I fuck her. I let her legs drift to the sides where they are caught in the crook of my elbow. Now she is spread open, and I fuck her beautiful lithe body. It is during this position that the little orgasms have finally accumulated to become the big one, and she cries out in guttural moans. I can feel her muscles clamping down on me, and I continue to fuck her. I release her legs and slowly push in and out of her body.
“Can you cum?” she asks in a whispered hush.
“Why?” I ask back.
“Because that orgasm really wiped me out and I’m a little tired from work and all.” She confides.
“Then you’ll have to be on top.” I state.
“Why?” she asks back.
“Because there is something about that position that makes me blow in no time, and I’m so nervous right now that if I continue fucking you I’ll last for probably three hours.”
“You’re shitting me.” She says.
“It’s happened three times before.”
I roll off of her and lie back on the bed. I am in the wet spot but I ignore it as Amy slides a leg over me and positions herself. She grips my cock and slips it back inside her delicate folds. She rocks back and forth, undulating her hips and panting loudly. She bites her lower lip as a little orgasm peels through her. She’s grinding hard on my cock and what I said about the position rings true and I can feel the coming of my own imminent orgasm. She begins bouncing up and down and tightening her vaginal muscles either voluntary or with the coming of another little orgasm. The sweet bounce of her breasts topped with her cherry nipples is a sight for my eyes and I soak it up. Her shoulder length blond-highlighted brown hair hangs down, covering her face. She lifts her head up and catches the moonlight on one side of her face and the candlelight on the other. Her pussy grips me with another little orgasm and begins milking me as she bounces up and down. Then I feel the brink of my own orgasm.
“Amy!” I call out.
“I’m about to cum!”
“Cum, Donny! Cum for me!”
Her words push me over that brink and she lets me cum deep in her unprotected pussy. Her bouncing is reduced to shallow undulations as she grinds wantonly on my oversensitive penis. I make a face and ask her to stop but she just sticks her tongue out at me from between her clenched teeth.
“Hey, I stopped when you asked me to!” I cry out in defiance.
Amy wriggles her butt a little before dismounting. “I’m going to go get cleaned up.” She says.
“Don’t leave, just use a shirt from the laundry basket over there,” and I gesture to the corner where the basket is. She leaves momentarily to retrieve a shirt and wipes the evidence from between her sticky legs and backside. I ask for the shirt when she is done and wipe myself off before tossing the doubly soiled garment back into the laundry basket. “Besides, you don’t know where the bathroom is, and I’m not telling.”
“What, did you hide it or something?” she says sarcastically as she climbs back into bed with me and snuggles herself close to my side.
“Yep.” I say.
“Oh shut up and hold me,” she says and I do. I kiss the top of her head and close my eyes and that is how we fall asleep our first night together.
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