Losing My Balance Ch. 02

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Hello readers! Sorry it’s been so long for those who waited and if I didn’t get back to you. I recommend reading the previous installment for context, or this won’t make much sense. Hope you enjoy, and any comments/constructive criticism is much appreciated! And finally, a big thank you to my editor Azure_skies!


From Irri’s Eyes:

There I was, not at my first gay club… but my first time at a gay club where I was actively pursuing. Yes, pursuing women. I could just imagine the smirk that Bee would have on, if she knew I was here. And that’s the thing, after that kiss, I didn’t want to tell her. I know she would be upset that I wasn’t telling her my feelings about my sexuality, but I didn’t want her to get the wrong idea. Yes, I’m embracing my bi-curious side, but it doesn’t have anything to do with her.

Don’t get me wrong, Bee is absolutely beautiful. She’s funny as fuck and wildly intelligent. She’s incredibly talented and one of the best people I know. However, I would not risk my friendship with her for a relationship. Friendships last longer than relationships. Besides, she wouldn’t be interested in me anyway because I’m not her type.

Anyway, I couldn’t go to the club alone because I’m way too self-conscious for that. Instead, I asked my brother and his boyfriend along. I’ve always been extremely close to my brother. He knew that he was gay at a young age, and I was the first he told. It made sense now, that I would confide in him about my bi-curious feelings. However, I didn’t tell him about what happened with Bee or how I felt about it. Amir just thought that she was too busy this weekend.

I was wearing my wedges that were comfortable enough to dance in, made my ass more pronounced, showed off my calves, and pushed my chest up. I was also dressed in a skirt which was tight around my ass and a shirt tucked into it. My eyeliner was winged and I wore bright red lipstick. I had a plan, and the tools to implement it.

In fact, when I had gotten to Amir’s apartment to pregame, Jeff, his boyfriend, grabbed his chest and yelled out, “Amir, we’re breaking up! Your sister’s made me straight!”

I couldn’t help but laugh, I loved hanging out with the two of them, who could ask for better wingmen?


From Bee’s Eyes:

Irri has avoiding me lately. Since the night that she had kissed me, I felt like she’s been holding me at a distance. She always thinks she can hide her feelings with me by directing more questions towards me when I try to dig a little into her. The thing is, I let her because when I push to go deeper, her military mind of avoidance strategies comes into play. Yes, she’s going to be a great lawyer!

In the meantime, I had been racking my head about why she hadn’t been talking to me. Was she embarrassed? Was she confused…? Could it have been more than just a silly kiss?

It couldn’t be. She’s always been straight and NEVER been attracted to women, though she admired them.

But why do I have to reassure myself? Mostly… I think it’s because if there was an inkling of a chance with her, I wouldn’t be giving a damn about anyone else. But, if she was curious, she would talk to me. We are at that point in our friendship, where we can always talk to each other about a thing and not have to be worried about the other casino oyna person thinking we’re silly or running off. There aren’t limits to this, no terms and conditions on this friendship agreement!

Anyway, it was Saturday night and I had a date with a chick that someone had set me up with. She was a cute petite red head, named Dana. But, even upon appetizers at the restaurant, I found out she was more of a talker than a listener. She couldn’t concentrate worth a damn when I talked. To be fair, she could just be nervous. Irri would tell me that I should just end it after dinner, if I didn’t want anything more. I needed to get lost in something though; you could say I was in the mood for a roll in the hay. Worrying about Irri had been stressing me out lately, and the possibility that…

Shut up Bee!

Instead of ending the night there, I suggested a club. It was one of the newer ones, and I was dressed up enough for it. I wore a soft collared white dress short that fell mid-thigh. My sleeves were pushed up over my elbows, with a couple of buttons undone to show some cleavage. On the bottom, I wore my leather leggings and as far as my hair went: I was wearing my long thick hair in a messy bun, stray hairs falling cross my cheeks. I looked good, and I didn’t want it just to go to waste on a dinner that wasn’t pulling me back for more. But maybe this night was still salvageable with the right drinks and the right dancing! Hopefully Dana could channel her nonstop talking into dancing. I wondered if she could compare with Irri though considering Irri’s years of Bhangra classes.

As my petite red head and I entered the club hand in hand, we went straight to the bar. Ordering four tequila shots on top of the drinks we had at dinner was a bit risky but what’s life without a little fun?


From Irri’s Eyes:

I was on the dance floor, my head was buzzing, the music was great and I had a delicious warm thrum throughout my body. Okay, I’ll admit it, I was drunk! But after these stressful days, it was the perfect way to let things go and relax into someone I could be.

My brother and his boyfriend were dancing in a way that could only involve alcohol and I was on my own nearby them. There were plenty of women around considering it was lady’s night. All of a sudden, as I had been rolling my hips to the fast paced bass, someone grabbed my hand and lightly tugged so I faced them. It was a hot woman by anyone’s standards with long brown hair and tight clothes in all the right places. She smiled at me, urging my body towards hers and I had enough alcohol to relax into it. My ass connected with her upper thighs, and her hands gripped my hips. You could say I knew a thing or two about how to move, having taken Bhangra classes since I was young. Bee would always drool in admiration whenever I danced!

As I got lost to the beat of the music and the feel of the woman’s body on mine, her hands started rubbing every inch of my skin. Over my legs, my arms, my stomach, my breasts… it made me wet.

Yes, good people of the jury, I was being turned on by a woman and I didn’t give a damn! Thank goodness for alcohol.

Her head urged me to tilt my neck, and her lips started pressing searing kisses all over. I pressed my ass against her firmly as goose bumps ran all over my skin. Reaching back, canlı casino my hand cupped the back of her head, holding her to me as she licked and nibbled all over my neck.

On my end, my hips were moving rhythmically, intensifying the friction between us. It wasn’t long before her hands maneuvered my body to face hers. Finally, with a moment of heated eye contact, our mouths fastened onto each other.

And, I have to say this about making out with a woman for the first time. There was no scruff and nothing to jolt me out of this silky kiss. It was fucking hot. Face to face, our bodies pressed up against one of each other, I had no idea breasts could feel this fucking fantastic. I wondered if the kiss between Bee and I had continued would have been like this… No I didn’t. I couldn’t, and I wouldn’t go there. I pressed myself against my mystery woman and kissed her with renewed energy. Getting lost in this was the perfect remedy.


From Bee’s Eyes:

Dana and I slid our way to the dance floor. I was right about her having a lot of energy- the music was great tonight, with a loud thumping bass. It made our dancing more passionate as we grinded up against one another. Her ass in my crotch, my arms grabbing her and pulling her close. And while she danced well, it was nothing compared to Irri’s dancing, especially the last time I had seen it.

We had decided to have a movie marathon and were drunk off our asses. Irri insisted we take a break from being couch potatoes and do a bit of stretching. She had been showing me a new song and talking about how all it made her want to do was to get down and dirty. I had to admit, this song by Marian Hill called “Got It” was hot as hell. Especially the lyrics… “I got this thing…gonna break you down, you’re crumbling till you hit the ground…”

The second Irri pulled out a chair and started rolling her hips into that godforsaken song, I couldn’t rip my eyes off of her hips. The way they must be when she’s riding whatever boy toy she was seeing. Whatever that thing was, she had it. The kind that could break someone down and willingly. I loved it when a girl rides me, so I could only imagine… No. No I’m not imagining. Anyway, the point is, Irri’s a fucking great dancer!

Fuck. The tequila was doing a number on me. I shouldn’t be thinking about her like that. And yes, my jealously prickled at the thought of her being with a guy like that, but I’m going to blame it on the a-a-a alcohol. I’m at a club, on a date, and drunkish. There is nothing to be alarmed about. This is just the alcohol and the kiss that had happened. That was it.

At that moment, Dana received a text from a friend who was in line outside of the club. She ran off to go meet her while I tried to get through the dance floor to get a cup of water. As I headed in that direction, I saw a couple of guys dancing on each other amidst all the women.

It was Amir, Irri’s brother! He was dancing along with his boyfriend. I ran over to him and tapped his shoulder. A grin lit up his face as he wrapped me in a big hug. He laughed into my ear, “Irri said you were too busy this weekend to explore her lesbihonest side, you’re gonna surprise her! Our girl has already caught someone!” He wiggled his eyebrows and gestured to his right.

Immediately, my body tightened up. kaçak casino I inhaled sharply and my brows furrowed. His concerned eyes had caught mine and my reaction. I saw him put two and two together, but to be honest, it was like I was watching from underwater. Irri was exploring a different side? Irri was with a woman? And she lied… She lied to Amir about me. She purposefully excluded me, which meant she didn’t want me to know about this.

I looked intently, and that’s when I really did lose it.

Irri was there, looking gorgeous as fuck, with some bitch pawing at her body while they made out. Her hair was messed up in that way that could only come about by intensely making out and she was covered by a light sheen of sweat. Her skirt clung to her ass in the most delicious way.

Irri was making out with a girl.

A sharp, deep, white hot burn formed in the pit of my stomach as I tried to calmly walk over.

She had lied to me.





From Irri’s Eyes:

The woman I was kissing was all over me and I liked it. I really fucking liked it. My body was on fire and I was wet while we frenched on the dance floor… But I started to feel a persistent tapping on my shoulder. I broke apart from the kiss, and looked up, my eyelashes fluttering.


I wasn’t imagining it. It was Bee, and she looked angry. Angry in a way that I hadn’t seen in a long time. I observed her outfit. Stray hair framed her face and my eyes dropped to her cleavage just for a moment. Was she on a date? Who had she been with?

Bee just looked at me, dark eyes boring into mine and I felt a cold guilt wash over my turned on body and my drunken haze. My heart pounded wildly while looking at her, and I glanced over to Amir only to see him shrugging apologetically.

Okay. My mind raced. So I had lied to her. About two things.

But did she really need to know about every single detail of my life? Yes we told each other most things, but we were still entitled to our privacy! Just because I was questioning, didn’t mean I had to share this with her. Not until I was ready! Isn’t that a part of the code or something?

And yes, I did lie to Amir and thus to her about what I was up to. And for that I was sorry, really fucking sorry.

I turned to the girl who I had been dancing with but she had wandered off. I sighed, at least that was taken care of. No harm, no foul. Slowly, I turned back to Bee, her eyes were still hard, her mouth in a frown. I hadn’t seen her look at me like this before.

Part of it was definitely anger… But there was more to it. Her eyes slowly traveled up and down my body in a way that made me feel even more flushed than I had been before. They lingered on my mouth for a moment and I instinctively bit my lip.

She didn’t say a word. Her hand came up slowly as she motioned towards the outside patio of the club. I was lucky, right? At least she wanted to talk to me right now.

I smiled at her for a moment, thinking that things would be okay. But she just turned around without a second glance. Shit. This was not good. Her hand grabbed mine as she tugged me along like a rag-doll, there was a slight sway to her steps and her cheeks were tinged with pink. This did not bode well; we were both drunk and about to have an emotional talk. So much for a no strings attached hook up tonight. Instead, my best friend was here and that meant all the fucking strings attached in the world. Wish me luck, I’m gonna need it.

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