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It’s not something I like to talk about. Not to everybody, you understand. I mean, it’s not like I’m embarrassed…just, it’s private. Special. And wrong.
Troy is my older brother. We’re about five years apart in age, which makes him twenty-four. I’m nineteen. Our parents split up when I was three and since Dad worked two jobs after getting custody of us, Troy looked after me while I grew up. I never knew either of my parents very well. When Dad got home from work he drank slowly and quietly until he was drunk enough to sleep, and I haven’t even spoken to my mom since I was twelve. Last I heard she was planning a cross-country road trip. I haven’t heard from her since she left.
Troy wasn’t exactly voted most popular in high school. He had auburn hair and dark eyes and was interested in politics and law – that doesn’t make for a popular teenager. He was well built and dated frequently, but he never stayed with any girl for too long. He seemed to prefer the blonde, blue-eyed type, generally cheerleaders. Totally not what I expected from him. But I was just his kid sister – someone who held him back, someone he had to come to early to cook supper for, to make sure I made curfew. He never complained but I felt like a burden. Anyway, he won a couple of scholarships at graduation and left for college when I was fourteen. I was devastated. I just couldn’t picture my life without Troy.
Well, Troy’s reputation as a quiet type followed me through high school. It wasn’t totally off the mark anyway. I was lost without Troy’s advice and guidance and got involved with some crazy kids my freshman year. I drank a lot that year – so much that I scared myself. I felt worthless and alone. After a bad mix up with the cops (I was lucky; they dropped the charges for underage drinking because it was my first offence) I went clean and devoted myself to school. Still lonely and friendless, I looked forward to Troy coming home in the summer more than anything.
Those summers brought us closer than ever. Troy made me feel beautiful and loved just by talking to me and sitting with me outside in the summer dusk. We sat and talked every night, each summer bringing us closer. He started bringing girls home less and less until last year, when he didn’t bring any home at all. When I asked him why, he said it was because he was more and more embarrassed about Dad’s drinking. But there was a painful glint in his eye before he turned away.
Well, I’m not getting any scholarships at graduation this year, so unfortunately I’ve had to put off college. There just isn’t any money for me to go without scholarships, so I decided to get a job and try to put myself through. I was so upset and disappointed that I couldn’t finally leave home that Troy told me I could move in with him, but I was scared to move to a city without a job or anything to fall back on. I grew up in a tiny town in Georgia and Troy goes to school in Dallas. As much as I wanted to get out of my house I couldn’t be a burden to him, especially now that he was going into law school. I told him I could work just as well from home and then I’d join him the next fall. He promised me that he’d make me change my mind this summer. “What does that mean?” I wondered.
“Hi, Callie,” someone whispered behind me.
“Oh, my God, Troy, it’s you!” I exclaimed. “You scared me half to death. Let me finish these dishes and I’ll make you something to eat. You must be starving.”
“Don’t worry about it, honey,” he whispered. “Keep it down, will you? Don’t wanna wake him up.” He nodded his head behind him at the living room, where Dad lay sleeping on the couch, an empty glass of whiskey on the table.
“Sorry,” I smiled. “Want to go sit on the porch, or what?” I peeled off the rubber gloves, abandoning the dishes. Surely Dad wouldn’t mind. Of course, when did he mind about anything? “When did you get in?”
“Just stepped off the bus fifteen minutes ago, ma’am.” Troy answered. “Got a ride from the station with Don’s dad. You remember Don? He’s a marketing ataşehir escort bayan supervisor in Miami now.”
“Wow.” Yeah, I remembered Don. Too well. He was one of Troy’s oldest and most trusted friends. But why did Troy sound so different? It was like he was holding something back from me. The happiness slowly faded from my eyes, and then I noticed – Troy only had an overnight bag. What was going on?
“Troy – what’s up?” I asked softly.
“Let’s go on the porch, okay, Cal?” he asked, looking again at the sofa.
“Sure,” I said uncertainly. We went out, careful not to let the screen door slam behind us.
“I’m not staying, Cal.” Troy didn’t look at me. The tears were welling in his eyes; he knew how much this would hurt me. Another whole year without him, stuck here! “I can’t do it,” I thought wildly. “I can’t take another year of this.”
“What do you mean?” I stammered. “You have to stay.”
“I can’t do another year of this, honey,” he said quietly, nodding his head toward the open screen door. “And I’m not letting you, either.” His jaw tightened. “He’s never been a father to you,” he muttered.
“I have nowhere to go, Troy,” I whispered, tears choking my words. “And I’m all he’s got.”
“You’re all I’ve got, Callie,” Troy said huskily. “Doesn’t that count for something? I’ve been there for you for years; be there for me now.”
“Oh, God,” I said. I felt unbelievably guilty and scared. I wanted so badly to go with Troy but I felt obligated to stay with Dad in spite of everything.
“He’ll go to bed soon,” Troy said. “When he goes, go pack everything that matters. We’ll take the bus out tonight. Don’s dad is coming by at eleven tonight to take us to the station. I have to go for a walk, Callie…I can’t even be around him anymore. He abandoned us, just like Mom. I can’t deal with that anymore.”
“Troy, I don’t know,” I whispered, drying my tears.
“Callie, I’m never coming back.” He looked at me directly, touching my hand.
“Okay.” I said quietly, resolutely. There was no way I was going to give up Troy forever. When he got up and left, I quaked inwardly. What if Dad caught me? What would he do? I was afraid of Dallas; afraid of a big city and not having a job. When I saw Dad slowly climb the stairs to bed, I slipped inside and tiptoed to my bedroom off the kitchen. I began stuffing things into big garbage bags – I would sort it out in Dallas. Dallas! I grew afraid again and stopped. Was Dad still awake? No, I think that was the house settling. After I got everything packed I sat on my bed, pressing my hands together to keep them from shaking.
Suddenly the door opened. “Callie…” Dad said in his drunken slur. “What are you doing, baby girl?” He looked at my room, at the garbage bags on the floor. “Where do you think you’re going?” He smiled drunkenly. “Running off, like your mother.” He reached towards me, touched my long auburn hair. “You look a lot like your mother,” he breathed, moving close to me. “I think we need o do something before you leave.” He stumbled towards me, my eyes growing wider in horror. “I’m not letting you leave me again without fucking,” he slurred.
He had me confused with my mother. I realized as his hands fumbled with his belt buckle that he was going to try to have sex with me. I wasn’t a virgin, but I was still horrified at the thought of having sex with my drunken father. He fell on top of me, his hands pushing at the hem of my shirt, pulling it over my head and exposing my breasts clad only in a lace bra. “I was sobbing, shoving his hands away from me. “Dad, Daddy, it’s me, please don’t, Daddy, it’s me, Callie,” I sobbed.
“What the FUCK is this.” Troy burst into my room just as Dad was pulling down my jeans. “Get out,” he growled at Dad as their eyes locked. “Get the fuck out.”
Troy had his arm around me – I was safe on the dimly lit overnight bus. I was drifting in and out of sleep leaning on him. No one could make me feel as safe as he could.
“Cal, you awake,” escort kadıköy he whispered.
“Yeah,” I said softly.
“You okay? I mean, really. Has he ever…”
“”Oh, no,” I tried to smile. “No, this is the first time.” My voice caught as I thought back to the horrifying experience.
“Okay, honey. Have you ever done…anything…”
“You can ask me, Troy. I trust you more than anyone.”
“Are you a virgin?” He asked me timidly.
“No.” I said quietly. I paused. “I slept with Don.”
“What?” Troy bolted to face me. “When?”
“Don’t get mad, Troy,” I whispered.
“Oh, I’m not mad. Not mad at all that my best friend fucked my baby sister.”
“I was sixteen.” I whispered. “It was more than once.”
“Sixteen? Christ. How often?” He asked dejectedly.
“A few times,” I admitted. Don and I had slept together for the better part of a year, but I wasn’t going to tell him that.
“That fucking bastard,” Troy mumbled.
I didn’t answer. My experiences with sex were unexciting, uneventful. When Don moved to Miami, I was glad.
“Go to sleep, honey,” Troy whispered softly. “I’ll wake you when we get there.”
We got to Dallas in the afternoon and took a cab to Troy’s apartment. My apartment. I felt a bit useless because I had nothing to do; no one to pour drinks for or make dinner for. Troy ordered in Chinese and I sat down to try to figure out my options. I could probably waitress. I’d go out tomorrow to look for ‘Help Wanted’ signs. The sun was beginning to sink slightly, creating a soft pink glow in the apartment.
Troy came to sit beside me on the couch and for the first time I noticed tiny lines on his face. He seemed so much older than me, so much wiser. I suddenly felt inexperienced and young, the way you feel when you are with an older lover for the first time.
Troy broke the silence. “You’re beautiful, Cal. I knew this city would bring out your beauty. That sun on your face is just like a picture. I think a lot about those evenings on the front porch. Those times are the best I ever experienced at home, I want you to know that.”
“Oh, Troy… they were for me, too,” I said softly. “I used to just wait for your summer vacation…I never had friends in high school…”
His hand reached for the back of my head, silently, his fingers intertwined in my hair. I looked up timidly, my eyes still glistening with tears, my look questioning, uncertain. Troy had a strange mixture of deep love and hunger in his eyes, along with a brief flash of pain. Why does he keep looking at me that way?
“Troy, what’s wrong? Tell me – tell me.” I whispered.
“I’m not like him, Callie, damn it!” he shouted. “I’m not some fucking pervert, God, I keep trying to tell myself not to feel like this…” he jumped up and ran his hand through his hair, paced back and forth in front of the couch. “He…he was touching you, Callie, and… I want to hate him for it! I do! But…I’m jealous.”
I didn’t know anymore whether he was talking about Dad or Don. “Who was touching me, Troy?”
“They both did, both of them. I trusted them both with you and they both betrayed me, they both used you. I told Don, he knew how I felt about you. And Dad! What the fuck was he thinking? I don’t even want you to see me like this, Cal, I don’t know what’s coming over me. I just know that I’m sick about leaving you with them for so long. Just sick.” Troy’s breath was ragged, his hands shaking.
“I’m okay,” I whispered. “I agreed…with Don. And Dad, this is the first time, I told you. I’m okay, Troy.”
“That’s not the point, Callie. Jesus! I don’t even want to tell you, you’ll think I’m perverted, you’ll think I’m sick…”
“I would never,” I said, my heart beating loudly in my chest.
“I…wanted you. I wanted to be with you…the first time,” he whispered softly, kneeling down in front of me and taking my face in his hands. “Now you know how fucked up I am. There was never, ever any girl for me… but you.”
My bostancı escort heart fluttered and my stomach clenched tightly. I wanted this – I never knew it, but oh, I wanted this amazingly! Troy’s face was so close to mine, his hands so warm. I didn’t know what to do next but I did it anyway – I leaned in slowly and kissed him, kissed my brother. I looked at him timidly and his eyes were so warm and tender and loving that I knew no matter what, we would be okay. Everything would be fine with Troy.
Troy’s hands moved towards the back of my head, his fingers catching hold of my hair and then sliding down my back. The air was silent, the only sound was our soft breathing and the rustling sounds of clothing on bare skin. His lips were kissing my neck, my collarbone. I felt a burning warmth spread towards my pussy, the lips engorging with my heat. Troy’s hands moved down my body, stopping only momentarily at certain areas he evidently couldn’t believe he was touching. I was timid; I didn’t know where he wanted to be touched, so I didn’t touch him at all. He didn’t seem to mind, though. He was intent on exploring my entire body, using his hands and his mouth. Troy slowly undid the buttons on my shirt, exposing my lace bra – the same one I had been wearing last night. I saw a pained expression on his face when he saw the bra – obviously reminded him of my father. As he removed my shirt, he took the bra with it and threw it across the room. “I’ll buy you a new one, Callie,” he whispered, before taking one of my nipples into his hot mouth.
I moaned softly, feeling the delicious warmth spread from my nipple throughout my chest. My pussy was soaking wet, it must have been going through my pants. I didn’t remember ever being so turned on. “Troy…” I whispered, looking down at him sucking and licking my nipple. “Can you…” My eyes drifted southward on my body and he got the message. He pulled down my pants slowly, revealing the matching lace panties that he removed rather quickly. With my wet pussy now exposed, I was a little more frightened about what was happening, but Troy’s obvious happiness calmed any fears I had and I spread my legs for him, showing him how wet I was before dipping one of my own fingers inside myself.
“Oh, Christ, Callie,” he whispered. His hands were absently removing his belt, his pants…there was his cock. “Do it again, baby,” he said softly.
I sat in front of my brother with my legs spread, using my fingers to touch my pussy. His hand was stroking his cock to hardness and I was mesmerized by his rhythmic movements. I gestured for him to sit on the couch and I knelt in front of him, taking his cock in my hands.
“Have you done this before, baby?” He asked.
“Yes,” I whispered. Not the answer he wanted to hear, perhaps, but the truth.
Troy groaned as my hands slid up and down his slippery cock. “Put it in your mouth, baby,” he moaned.
I leaned forward and slipped his cock inside my mouth, licking the head and making slight slurping noises. My pussy was so wet, I needed him inside me. There was no time for a blow job right now. I got up from my knees, my hand still on his cock, and straddled my brother.
“Are you sure about this, baby,” Troy asked. “There’s no turning back from here.”
“I need your cock, big brother. I needed it yesterday, I needed it three years ago. I want it now.” I lowered myself down onto his cock, feeling him slip easily into my wet pussy. Riding him felt like the easiest thing I’ve ever done. Troy’s hands cupped my breasts – “I like to feel them bounce” – and my arms wrapped around his shoulders. I couldn’t think straight. I needed to come, so badly. My clit burned with desire, so I took a hand away from Troy’s shoulders to make myself come. My fingers moved in a blur as I rode my brother’s hard cock.
“Fuck, Callie, I’m gonna come, baby,” Troy whispered.
“I want it inside me, Troy, come inside me,” I said through gritted teeth. My orgasm was almost there…almost…I saw exploding colours and felt Troy empty himself into my wet hole. “Oh, God, Troy…” I gasped, unable to think coherently yet.
“Just let me hold you, honey,” he whispered. “Stay still, let me hold you.”
To be continued……(please give feedback!)
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